Blake Snow

writer-for-hire, content guy, bestselling author

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Written by blake

Can GREAT ART come from happy, well-balanced, and multi-dimensional people?

Courtesy Yue Minjun

Over the years I’ve observed first-hand how great art often comes from the most tormented people. Musicians, movie stars, writers, entrepreneurs.

As I’ve written before, to become an icon (if not achieve worldwide greatness), you have to sacrifice just about everything else in life, which often makes said person a one-dimential, incredibly driven, and often sociopathic.

Is it possible, however, for happy, well-balanced, and/or multi-dimensional people to create great art? Joseph Berger, an artist from New York, sure thinks so.

“The perpetuation of the long suffering mythology of art is a thing which makes me unhappy,” he writes. “It is promulgated by people who have either never suffered enough to really know what suffering is, or otherwise by happy idiots who have never done a worthwhile thing in their lives, and by people who watch way to much TV or its equivalent, and buy the shopworn notion of art and artists, which predicates itself on a cultural aesthetic that is arcane at best, and insulting to the very fabric of the quality of mind that art does require. Art has nothing to do with any single emotional state of being. Art is thing that people do, just the same as feelings of all sorts are things that we each experience. And I am far more concerned about the state of mind of the person driving a car on a highway in vicinity of mine, and how their emotional state affects their driving in the moment than I am about how it affects their art.”

As a self-prescribed multi-dimentional, well-balanced, and happy artist, I sure hope so.

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Re-reading The Old Man and The Sea for the first time since high school

Spoiler alert: I loved it nearly as much today as I did as a teenager. The only difference is it meant a little more back then to me as this was the book that turned me onto literature and reading in general.

Rating: ★★★★★ These were my favorite passages this time around:

  • He was an old man who fished alone in a skiff in the Gulf Stream and he had gone eighty-four days now without taking a fish.
  • The thousand times that he had proved it meant nothing. Now he was proving it again. Each time was a new time and he never thought about the past when he was doing it.
  • Imagine if each day a man must try to kill the moon, he thought. The moon runs away. But imagine if a man each day should have to try to kill the sun? We were born lucky, he thought.
  • Now is no time to think of what you do not have. Think of what you can do with what there is.
  • I hope no one has been too worried. There is only the boy to worry, of course. But… many of the older fishermen will worry. Many others too, he thought. I live in a good town.
  • “The hell with luck,” the boy said. “I’ll bring the luck with me.”
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Published works: Misjudging Madrid on foot, scooter, and bougie Range Rover

Courtesy Shutterstock

My latest for Paste Magazine: After years of traveling, not once have I heard the following: “I love Madrid!” A quick Google search confirms this consensus; the Spanish capital is notably absent from most “Europe’s best cities to visit” lists. In the two instances it was, the unassuming city barely cracked the top 40.

That’s not to say Madrid isn’t a great city. It’s rich, ornate, bright, pedestrian-friendly, and filled with some of the warmest locals and food on the continent. But not all great cities double as desirable tourist destinations.

Does Madrid? To find out, the generous folks at Land Rover recently invited me to drive their new electric Range Rovers through the city’s scenery, in between some of the top sights, and even on some outskirt off-road terrain. This is what I learned.

Continue reading…

Tom Cruise: Anatomy of an Actor is a case study on acting, ambition, and acceptance

Because I think Top Gun 2 is the greatest blockbuster in a decade, I recently finished Tom Cruise: Anatomy of an Actor by Amy Nicholson.

I was originally unsure of some of the “10 iconic roles” Nicholson chose to break down, especially from some of Cruise’s poorly rated performances. But in hindsight, I actually appreciated her critique of his weaker roles, as well as her wide-ranging coverage of most of his other roles.

In other words, no one is perfect. And sometimes critique of our misses is just as insightful and inspiriting as our hits. If you like cinema, movie stars, and/or driven people, I highly recommend this well-written and eye-pleasing hardback.

Rating: ★★★★☆

Published works: It’s Okay to Just Hang at the Hotel and Do Absolutely Nothing

Courtesy Blake Snow

My latest for Paste Magazine: I recently read a quote that said, “I don’t want to leave vacation without knowing anything about the destination.” The implication was that travelers have some sort of moral responsibility to learn about the places they visit.

This rubbed me the wrong way. I say that as a lifelong student who usually devours foreign customs, culture, and ways of life while traveling. But sometimes you don’t want to do anything on vacation, and that’s totally okay. Sometimes you just want a break from daily routines, schedules, tasking, and commitments, and that’s wholly appropriate.

Whether you travel a lot or not, sometimes it’s refreshing to do absolutely nothing on vacation. No sightseeing. No local cooking classes. Just rest and relaxation. After a year of travel at nearly pre-pandemic levels, that’s exactly how I felt on a recent family holiday to Newport Beach, California.

Continue reading…

More than just tin cans and sushi: Tuna are amazing creatures!

As one of the fastest fish in the sea, tuna can swim nearly 50 miles per hour. The largest species, the Atlantic bluefin, and grow as long as 15 freakin’ feet.

In short, tuna are incredible, as this captivating profile by Katherine Rundell so deftly proves: “If you land a big tuna after a six-hour fight, fight him man against fish when your muscles are nauseated with the unceasing strain, and finally bring him alongside the boat, green-blue and silver in the lazy ocean, you will be purified and be able to enter unabashed into the presence of the very elder gods, and they will make you welcome.”

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FANTASTIC: The highs and lows of professional soccer (and investing in hope)

What happens when two Hollywood actors who know nothing about soccer buy a middling pro team in Wales? GQ’s Tom Lamont spent a season following football’s newest fans to find out. “Maybe we don’t make it all the way to the Premier League,” Reynolds allowed, “but if this club is promoted, once, twice, that’s epic, right? That’s history.” Continue reading…

Published works: Top 20 National Parks

The author at Badlands National Park (courtesy Lindsey Snow)

My latest for Paste Magazine: America invented the national park when it made Yellowstone the world’s first in 1873, introducing the idea that “extraordinary” land should be protected from public development and preserved for future generations. After visiting half of the country’s 63 National Parks, it’s obvious some are better than others. A handful of recent ones (Cuyahoga Valley, Indiana Dunes) seem downright ordinary, if not political, when compared to less prestigious but clearly superior state parks like Na Pali or Custer.

With nine total, California has the most National Parks, followed by Alaska with eight, and Utah with five. In fact, the western United States is home to over 80% of National Parks, even though just a quarter of the population lives there. This explains why The Great Smoky Mountains in Tennessee welcomes the most visitors, over 14 million annually, compared to Zion’s 5 million, the second most.

Wherever you go, if you only see 20 in your lifetime, make it these icons. Continue reading…

Cliff jumping the Irish coast is a thing now. I tried “coasteering” and oh my…

“I don’t think I’m suppose to jump into that.”

This thought came to my mind only moments before my first leap from the edge of a seaside cliff in Ireland. The fall was no more than six feet. But the swelling sea was angry, frothy, and splashing to and fro. Despite my mega-sized life vest, double wetsuit, protective gloves, and helmet, this massive tide pool surrounded by skin-cutting rock on all but one side looked like it would swallow me whole.

“Jump!” my expert guide commanded. Like many of you, I’ve been told to respect the ocean my entire life. Now some self-proclaimed authority was telling me to plunge into the worst of it. All in all, the conditions couldn’t have been any less inviting.

But like all good lemmings, I disregarded my instincts, trusted my equipment, and accepted the advice of my convincing leader. I jumped.

Kerplunk. Continue reading…

Published works: 7 National Parks That Will Scare The Living Daylights Out Of You

Courtesy Adobe Stock

My latest for Expedia: “Everybody’s heard of haunted houses, but haunted National Parks? Surprisingly, these green, tranquil spaces are also often backdrops for gruesome ghost sightings and other petrifying paranormal activity. And we’re not talking about one-off stories or urban (or in this case, rural) legends. All of the below top the list of the most “haunted” National Parks in the United States – places with an unexpected dark side. We dare you to hike alone.”

Continue reading…

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Spinal fusion: 10 things I learned surviving a scary-sounding and life-altering surgery

blakefusion

Frankenstein back with 28 staples (credit: Lindsey Snow)

Life isn’t fair.

I was born with an 80 year-old back. Not exactly 80, but old. It first broke when I was 29. After surgery, it worked again, but only for another six years. It teetered and failed again late this summer in the same spot — a re-ruptured L4/5 disc. The thing was so decrepit, my surgeon had to remove the remains and fuse my spine.

Now I’m resigned to a life of low impact and light lifting. I can’t even hold my youngest brown-eyed boy in his final months of baby-dom, let alone lift a gallon of milk for a month. I can’t return to full activity for six months until the vertebrae fully fuse. And after that, I’m advised to give up running, basketball, soccer, and maybe wake boarding or else.

It sucks.

But it’s not all bad. In fact, I’ve got a heck of a lot to look forward to—a lot more to live for. While having my body deteriorate ahead of schedule and the long recovery are both humbling, I also feel inspired by the experience. Here are 10 things I learned post surgery:  Continue reading…

Published works: Two canyons—one colossal, one narrow, both awesome

Courtesy Shutterstock

My latest for Paste: I am drawn to canyons. Like the ocean, they make me feel small. Unlike the ocean, they show their age and literally wear their scars on their sleeves. This, of course, makes them who they are. But it also makes them interesting. So I travel to canyons a lot.

On a recent holiday weekend, I hauled my family to two of America’s most popular canyons—Grand Canyon in Arizona and Zion Canyon in Utah. Given the rugged terrain, it’s smart to come prepared for more off-road conditions (I drove a Kia Telluride during our trip).

Transportation aside, these two massive canyons are only separated by a two-hour scenic drive, which makes them great for pairing. Before planning a similar getaway, here’s what you need to know. Continue reading… 

The discouraging odds of becoming a professional athlete

proathletechart

To many boys (and some girls), professional athletes are modern-day heroes. Iconic celebrities with fame, fortune, and power. What wide-eye youth wouldn’t want the same?

Turns out, a lot of them do. (With oversized Bo Jackson and Michael Jordan posters adorning my childhood walls, I certainly did.) But as with all desirable things in life, getting paid to play sports isn’t easy.

In fact, the odds are downright nasty for aspiring players, according to new data from the NCAA.

Continue reading…

It took me 20 years, but I finally found the college professor that changed my life

This is what I emailed to him earlier this year:

Hi, Clark.

I think I found you!

With the help of an old friend who remembered your last name this week, some helpful secretaries at BYU who identified your first name, and some Google sleuthing, I think you’re the professor that unknowingly changed my life.

Let me explain. I majored in business because I didn’t know what I wanted to do. I had a couple of cantankerous English professors that mistakenly made me believe I didn’t like writing. That all changed when I met you.

The specifics are foggy, but I clearly remember you giving me the greenlight to write about my passions, anything I wanted really, which was all it took to flip the switch on falling in love with writing sentences for a living.

Shortly after taking your MCOM class, I started blogging everyday. I wrote every day. And I have done so ever since as a freelance writer and journalist. It took me a couple of years after graduating in 2004 to go full-time, but I soon did, and I’ve wanted to personally thank you ever since.

Thanks for altering my career course for the better. Writing feels more like a calling than a job. I’m so grateful for great teachers like yourself.

Better yet, I was thrilled to learn you live in Provo (I never left either). May I take you to lunch and hand-deliver my first two books sometime?

He answered yes, we’ve since gone to lunch, and plan on staying in touch. The world is an amazing place!

How to succeed: Don’t quit until everyone in the room tells you “no”

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After a decade of self employment, I’ve been told “no” several thousand times. I have records. For the same period, I’ve been told “yes” a few dozen times. Fewer than a hundred. I have records of that, too.

As you can tell, I–like most humans, salesmen, and business owners–experience rejection more than acceptance. Unlike many people, however, I don’t let that discourage me as a proprietor. But I almost did once.

Continue reading…

Forced writing is bad writing. Only write what you know for sure.

I didn’t want to become a writer until my second to last semester of college.

I was in business school at the time and wrongly assumed I didn’t like writing. That’s because I took a couple of freshman English prerequisites that were taught by crotchety old professors who were more concerned with grammar and punctuation than writing with substance. So I assumed English and writing was the study of syntax, not creative or effective communication.

That all changed when I met Clark Hammond, my professor of the mandatory business writing class I had put off until my final year of school. The specifics are foggy, but I clearly remember him giving me the green light to write about whatever subject interested me most that semester. At the time that was sports and video games. So that’s what I wrote about, and it was a blast!

Because I was writing about something that interested me, I finally made it a point to learn the proper “syntax” so my message could reach the widest possible audience. In that way, I still learned what my earlier English professors wanted to, I just did it with my heart this time because the substance actually mattered to me.

I’ve written almost every day of my life ever since. I’ve covered dozens of topics and only turned down a handful that just didn’t excite or interest me. Obviously we’re all forced to write about things we aren’t passionate about. But as long as you write about what you know for sure, what you believe in most, or the point of view that matters to you most, honesty will always come through in your writing.

You want this because readers are starved for honesty. They get bombarded with so much fakery, so much “forced” writing.

So they next time you put fingers to keyboards, try to write from the heart. And if you’re heart’s not fully in it, at least try to write from a perspective that matters most to you. Your writing, influence, and readership will be better for it.

See also: Bestselling author Blake Snow enters the Provo music scene

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Words to live by: Nobody cares. Work harder.

I recently stumbled on this phrase at a high school soccer game. I instantly liked it and can easily see what it’s popular among weightlifters, athletes, entrepreneurs, and optimists alike.

It also reminded me of some other mottos I’m fond of:

  • The harder I work, the luckier I get.
  • Don’t take things personal.
  • Pity parties are a waste of time.
  • There is no shortcut for hardwork.
  • Life moves on, with or without you.
  • If you want something, YOU have to go out and get it (that’s your job).

And last but not least, “Do you know where the power lies? I said it starts and ends with you.”

When is it okay to lie?

Honesty is the best policy. Except in two very specific situations.

  1. To protect yourself or someone else from danger. For example, we tell our kids to lie if someone at the door asks if their parents are home when we aren’t. Similarly, if someone is trying to manipulate, trick, or hurt you, they don’t deserve the truth, as they will try to use it against you. In these situations, you should always lie and encourage the loved ones in your life to do the same.
  2. To protect the feelings of others. If you have someone’s best interest at heart and are not lying to them for selfish reasons, research shows it’s beneficial to lie when someone’s feelings are involved. The classic example is if your spouse asks if they look good before leaving the door, especially when there’s no time to change. Rather than exaggerate, however, a comical half-truth can work much better to boost the confidence of loved ones and hopefully illicit a calming laugh. For example, “You looked worse on your wedding day,” spoken with a playful smile.

When in doubt or when trying to avoid the natural consequences of your bad behavior, honesty really is the best policy. But in these tricky situations, careful lying is the way to go.

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“Most humans don’t want the truth—they want to be told they’re okay.”

I have a super smart neighbor that’s now retired. After competing in the Olympics in track, he became a college professor as is the quintessential deep thinker. He dropped the following sentence at church recently, which gave me pause:

“Most humans don’t want the truth—they want to be told they’re okay.”

He’s got a point. I’m not sure if “most” humans don’t want the truth, but I know I lot of them would rather be told (or delude themselves) into thinking they’re okay. Granted, I think most humans are okay, but I think this line of thinking prevents us from progressing at times, myself included.

What do you think: Do humans value acceptance more than truth? And are the two mutually exclusive?

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Published works: Hiking Half Dome, America’s most deadly day hike

My latest for Paste Magazine: “I’m lucky to have thru- and day-hiked some of the most remarkable outdoors on the planet: the Rockies and Appalachians in North America, Patagonia and the Inca Trail in South America, the Alps and Mont Blanc in Europe. I’ve even hiked the ancient Kumano Kodo in Asia, which is considered the oldest designated hiking trail in the world.

“But last month I hiked the most demanding (if not deadly) day hike in my life so far: Yosemite’s Half Dome, located in the soaring Sierra Nevadas of California. I stress soaring because, at nearly 5,000 feet tall, Half Dome is twice as tall as the Grand Canyon. In fact, at an average of 3,000 feet tall, Yosemite’s granite canyons are some of the most dramatic you’ll find anywhere in the world.”

Continue reading…

How free mentors make you awesome

You’d be amazed at the number of experts willing to give free advice.

There are countless stories of unknown people looking up some of the world’s brightest minds, and then cold calling, cold emailing, or cold messaging them on social media to get a favorable response. Although the success rate is usually low, it’s actually higher than you think. Because of this, reaching out to expert strangers is often worth it.

The success rate for getting free advice among friends, family, and former associates, however, is shockingly high and always worth doing. In fact, you’re probably leaving tens of thousands of dollars on the table every year in free consulting and coaching by not reaching out and asking for help. For example, you could easily get guidance on your latest idea, work project, side hustle, hobby, or personal problem.

But you have to ask. Continue reading…

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What I’ve learned after 8 years of ride shares

I booked an Uber for the first time in 2015 while traveling to San Francisco for work.

Since then, I’ve booked hundreds of Ubers (and Lyfts) all around the world. I haven’t rented a car since (although I’ve rented a handful of Turos in that time).

Eight years later with every intention of ride sharing indefinitly, here are eight things I’ve learned:

  1. Ride sharing saves me time and money. It’s much faster, usually cheaper, and more rewarding than renting a car or cab. I mostly use ride shares for business and vacation. I love it.
  2. Drivers like to talk about themselves. The vast majority of drivers are talkers. Granted, I’m good at listening and ask lots of questions, because I selfishly want to learn from other humans. But several drivers just unload and never ask a single question in return.
  3. I’ve been a free therapists to several drivers. Some drivers latch on to my ears and unload their life story. Some have even cried, which is pretty amazing. Sometimes it’s too much and disrespectful, if not unprofessional. But mostly I don’t mind.
  4. Other drives are perfect. They ask a few questions, break the ice, talk a moment over shared interests, then let me quietly enjoy the rest of the ride. I like these drivers a lot and tip them often.
  5. I’m a “top tipper” (but don’t feel like one). Without my asking, several drivers have volunteered that only 30% of riders tip. This is lower than I expected but roughly in line with what I do (I tip about 40% of the time, usually no more than a few bucks). I almost always tip on longer rides but hardly ever on shorter rides. Despite this, I’m considered a “top tipper” on both apps. I miss the days when Uber didn’t ask or even allow for tips and would gladly pay higher fares if tips were included.
  6. I’m 5-star rider. I feel like the competition is thin when it comes to garnering a quality rider rating. Being kind, respectful, taking a genuine interest in drivers (they are fellow humans after all), and being polite goes a long way. It also gets you really fast pickups from the best drivers in the nicest cars.
  7. I would love to hang out with several drivers. One in particular exchanged phone numbers with me but later ghosted my texts. I felt like I was in high school again after the rejection.
  8. I’ve only puked in one car. Just kidding. I’ve never puked in a car. At least not a ride-sharing one.

All hail ride sharing!

Book review: Raising Good Humans will make you a better parent

As the father of five kids, I take parenting very seriously. I used to read a lot of parenting books when my children were young, but I haven’t read any in recent years until stumbling upon Raising Good Humans by Hunter Clarke-Fields and Carla Naumburg

I didn’t like the workbook-like format and belabored thoughts on mindfulness, but I did enjoy several of the insights, especially as I’m increasingly raising teenagers over toddlers these days.

These are some of the lessons that stood out:

  1. You literally cannot access the rational part of your brain when your stress response is triggered.
  2. If you make your body seem less threatening, and speak in a calmer voice instead of yelling, you’ll have a less-stressed child—and you’ll get more cooperation.
  3. If we’re not fully present with our kids, we miss the chance to attune with their cues about what is happening for them under the surface. We might miss the signal that our children need a hug or help instead of more direction in this moment.
  4. Parental presence is key to optimizing the chance of your child having a life of well-being and resilience. “When you love someone, the best thing you can offer is your presence. How can you love if you are not there?”
  5. Instead of learning from the moment, their stress response bypasses the upper parts of the brain and causes children to fight back, talk back, withdraw, or run away. They are not “misbehaving” in these moments, they are experiencing a stress response.
  6. Feeling compassion for ourselves in no way releases us from responsibility for our actions. Rather, it releases us from the self-hatred that prevents us from responding to our life with clarity and balance.
  7. “Instead of teaching children how to consider their own needs in relation to the needs of those around them… we force children to do what we want because it seems more efficient, or because we lack the energy or skill to do it differently.”—Oren Jay Sofer
  8. “The greatest gifts you can give your children are the roots of responsibility and the wings of independence.”—Denis Waitley
  9. Simplify Schedules: Children (heck, all of us) need free time to balance out their activities, get to know themselves, and feel peaceful.

Rating: ★★★☆☆

Here’s why door-to-door salesmen are growing

Courtesy New Yorker

I “sold” religion door-to-door in Brazil two decades ago and I know it annoyed a lot of people. But this fantastic long-read on for-profit door-to-door salesmen makes me feel slimy because these guys are a nuisance and largely dishonest. The problem with door-to-door product sales is that many (most?) harbor the dishonest believe that every household needs what they’re selling. That’s just not true. But because of the rise of spam lists and not call registers, door-to-door sales are actually growing. Hustle always works. And so does taking advantage of mentally feeble buyers.

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Book review: The Good Earth is good reading, like Steinbeck on Chinese culture

I recently finished reading The Good Earth by Pearl Buck. It was the best-selling book in America in 1931.

Despite being nearly 100 years old, I found both the writing and story to be a fascinating inside look into Chinese culture, as observed by the author who lived in the country for many years with her missionary parents.

While reading the book, these adages quickly came to mind: “History repeats” and “You can’t always get what you want.” I also came up with another: “Corrupt culture corrupts men faster than usual.”

Rating: ★★★★☆

These were my favorite passages:

  • Moving together in a perfect rhythm, without a word, hour after hour, he fell into a union with her which took the pain from his labor. He had no articulate thought of anything; there was only this perfect sympathy of movement, of turning this earth of theirs over and over to the sun, this earth which formed their home and fed their bodies and made their gods.
  • But out of the woman’s great brown breast the milk gushed forth for the child, milk as white as snow, and when the child suckled at one breast it flowed like a fountain from the other, and she let it flow. There was more than enough for the child, greedy though he was, life enough for many children, and she let it flow out carelessly, conscious of her abundance. There was always more and more. Sometimes she lifted her breast and let it flow out upon the ground to save her clothing, and it sank into the earth and made a soft, dark, rich spot in the field. The child was fat and good-natured and ate of the inexhaustible life his mother gave him.
  • He belonged, not to this scum which clung to the walls of a rich man’s house; nor did he belong to the rich man’s house. He belonged to the land and he could not live with any fullness until he felt the land under his feet and followed a plow in the springtime and bore a scythe in his hand at harvest.
  • Then in this city out of which something new was always springing at him, Wang Lung saw another new thing he did not understand.
  • But over the fields and the water the moonlight hung, a net of silver mist, and in his body his blood ran secret and hot and fast.
  • But O-lan returned to the beating of his clothes and when tears dropped slowly and heavily from her eyes she did not put up her hand to wipe them away; only she beat the more steadily with her wooden stick upon the clothes spread over the stone.
  • Then the good land did again its healing work and the sun shone on him and healed him and the warm winds of summer wrapped him about with peace.
  • Now five years is nothing in a man’s life except when he is very young and very old.
  • Wang Lung felt as though air and sunlight had been suddenly cut off because of the numbers of grey men tramping heavily and in unison through the town.
  • There was the third son to wed one day soon, and with that over there was nothing left to trouble him in his life, and he could be at peace. But there was no peace.
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To reach more people, write “bright and emotional” copy

Fan mail is better than hate mail. As a public writer, I get a lot more of the latter than I do the former. That’s because angry people take action more than happy people.

Today, however, I received a heartwarming thank you letter from a reader who enjoyed my recent travel column. “I could feel  your passion,” she wrote. “Your story is different because on top of being bright, I can feel the emotion.”

When I write, I’m significantly more concerned with helping the reader feel than any thing else. When describing something, I want them to feel what I did when experiencing it, as opposed to just describing it.

Description is important, too. That’s where I try to be as bright, honest, and accurate as possible. I hadn’t realized it until this fan mail said it, but “bright and emotional” have been reoccurring themes to my writing for nearly two decades.

Of course, there are other styles of effective writing. Dark, sterile, and intentionally ambiguous to suspend the reader. But similar to how most people try to avoid downers at a party, I believe bright and emotional stories reach a lot more people because they resonate better.

So the next time you write something, try to emote like a human and stay upbeat when describing things. In doing so, I’m confidant you’ll reach a lot more people.

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Published Works: 5 reasons to unwind at Cancun’s “newest” all-inclusive

My latest for Paste Magazine: “It’s amazing how colorful Cancun is on a sunny day, even if you’ve visited its beaches before. The ocean is a stunning combination of deep blues, cobalts, and teals—some of the most gorgeous you’ll ever see. What’s more, the celebrated city is home to more all-inclusives than anywhere else, which is partly why it’s such a popular vacation hop. (The other is Mexican affordability and American proximity.)

“With so many options to choose from, then, which resort stands out? As one of the very last a la carte hotels in Cancun to convert to an all-inclusive, Grand Fiesta Coral Beach is “new” in that it shuns the often pragmatic, systematized practices of traditional all-inclusives while staying true to its fancy heritage. Yes, the property is big and beautiful like other contenders. But the toothy staff are noticeably more attentive and personal, because they were “Hecho en Mexico” and clearly love their jobs.”

Continue reading…

BOOK REVIEW: Lost City of the Monkey God is riveting non-fiction; 5 stars out of 5

I recently finished Douglas Preston’s fantastic The Lost City of the Monkey God. It is an adventurous and profound true story about the recent discovery of a 500 year forgotten city located deep in the cartel-riddled jungles of Honduras. I. Could. Not. Put. It. Down.

Without spoiling the ending, this is what I wrote in my journal after pondering the finish for several minutes: “Survival of the fittest, a total inevitability, is difficult to accept. But survivors are not all criminals. Few of them actually are, in fact.

“Our modern existence is not a tragedy or sad story. Yes, death and destruction checker our past. But it does not define our existence. We are better off as a species because of our past, not in spite of it.”

Rating: ★★★★★

These were my favorite passages: Continue reading…

What 10,000 miles from home feels like

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On Earth, 12,450 miles is the farthest anyone can get from home. Take one more step in any direction, and you will have started your return journey from the halfway point.

Until I visit one of these places (aka 45° meridian east), I came as close to that point as I ever have last month. The distance from my home in Provo to Durban is over 10,000 miles, where I began a life-changing journey through the motherland.

I should have grasped this impressive separation sooner than I did. Upon booking airfare, total flight time read over 22 hours across three flights. “That’s a long haul,” I passingly noted, before moving to other travel arrangements.  Continue reading…

Published works: Everything you need to know before visiting Christ The Redeemer

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Here’s my latest for Fodor’s: 

8 people you should be extra kind to

Deal_with_it_dog_gifI was jogging last week and ran past a parked patrol car. A cop was in it.

I make it a habit to wave to everyone I encounter, so I cut the air with my hand and smiled. He waved back and flashed a big grin, as if I had just made his day—as if he rarely gets acknowledged by civilians.

Surprised by the effect it had, I started thinking of other people that might benefit from extra kindness. This is what I came up with: Continue reading…

Using numbers to look your best

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ABC

The world is full of qualitative statements. Exaggerations. Subjectiveness that cannot be measured. The people that make such statements are easily forgotten.

Quantitative statements, on the other hand, leave an impression. They measure your place in life. My father taught me this at an early age.

When I was nine years old, I ran a fast 400 meter dash, which is no easy feat. The thing about the 400 is not a lot of people run it. It’s difficult, because it’s not quite a sprint and not quite a distance race. As such, few amateurs compete in it. At least that was the case when I ran it.

So my father encouraged me to run the 400. I did. All the way to the ’88 state finals. Here’s how it happened:  Continue reading…

My favorite saying of the year is empowering: “I won’t judge”

credit: last week tonight

credit: last week tonight

I believe final, condemning, or otherwise hasty judgment of others is like hatred. It is learned, immoral, and vile behavior that worsens with age and leads to unhappiness.

Obviously, we’re required to make mortal judgments on the accused if on jury duty. And we need to judge the fruits and motives of others to make important decisions in life, such as choosing friends, voting for government leaders, engaging in business transactions, shielding our children from danger, or marrying someone.

(Similarly, hatred of conditions—never people—can inspire action, but that’s another story).

While many of us struggle in making the above judgments, all of us suck when it comes to judging others out of misguided fear, selfishness, or an attempt to validate our lifestyle over another’s. It is this type of misjudgment that is so difficult to avoid.

Earlier this year, I learned a useful trick for combating this. Continue reading…

Descriptive writing: Is accuracy more important than feelings?

I was recently asked to ghostwrite an article about autism in the workplace. The draft I was given used “different” about half a dozen times to describe autistic people. As a writer, that’s five times too many; maybe even six too many, since “different” is a boring, catch-all adjective that’s too vague to hold any real meaning.

Like I always do when wordsmithing, I started replacing redundant adjectives with new synonyms to keep things moving. This is because readers quickly get bored, and my job is to keep them reading until the final punctuation.

As I rewrote and constructed new sentences, I used several adjectives and descriptions that were later rejected and/or deemed too sensitive at best, derogatory at worst. The words I chose didn’t imply “of little worth,” which is the definition of derogation. Nevertheless, all but “different” and “neurologically diverse” were rejected.

While I still enjoy incredible first amendment freedoms as a writer, I will say the craft has gotten slightly more sensitive in recent years. There’s even a double standard sometimes. For example, it’s deemed appropriate to refer to non-autistic people as “typical” but frowned upon to refer to autistic people as “atypical.”

Although 95% of my editors are fantastic, it’s discouraging when someone rejects my honest attempt to keep writing fresh with accurate and stimulating adjectives. It rarely happens, but some editors favor politically correct terms over clarity and diverse writing. Ultimately that’s a disservice to the subjects themselves—in this case a lovable, unpredictable, and soft-spoken subsect of humanity.

Moral of the story: When descriptive words are limited, I believe readers and subjects both lose. As I’ve said before, it’s better to offend one reader while reaching another instead of being ignored or overlooked by both. When describing reality, accuracy should always prevail.

Yes there are people that intentionally use derogative words to describe people they deem as inferior. But most of us aren’t like that. We should give the majority of people the benefit of the doubt. And we can always follow up if we’re unsure about someone’s intent.

You know—ask questions first, shoot last.

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Big problems aside, here’s why today is the greatest time to be alive

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While the world is far from perfect, today is a better place for the greatest number of people than at any time in history, regardless of race, gender, or 99% of nationalities.

This is especially true of higher life expectancy and living conditions in every country (including North Korea), less disease-related deaths, total poverty (i.e. checked capitalism usually works), war, dictators, injustices, and crime, and higher education and literacy rates.

You might be tempted to think that ongoing social unrest, COVID, and the Russian-Ukrainian war changed all of that, but you would be wrong. By a wide range of measures, there is simply no better time to be alive than today, even with its drawbacks.

Better yet, the fact that the world has slowly but surely gotten better, means the future will be better too. In fact, there’s no indication that society suddenly stops making social progress as equality improves or reaches a certain threshold.

I don’t mean to be insensitive to any one person or group of people currently going through a tough time. But how can you not like the overall direction we’re headed?

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How heeding our body clocks leads to better health

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Can we improve our health by changing when we do something during the day? “Yes,” argue a growing number of circadian doctors.

For instance, the above report found that over half of our body’s organs and cells function on a 24 hour clock and perform differently depending on the sun. For example, our livers like to sleep at night, so if we wake them up with food when the sun goes down, they don’t do as good of a job and people who eat late are statistically heavier and sleep poorly.

The same is true of skipping sleep on the weekends to socialize or consuming more calories in the second half of the day. Researchers found that doing this wrecks our performance and digestion until we get back on rhythm. Athletes in particular are especially aware of this as it affects their income (as it does our office work, whether we know it or not).

Although we still don’t know all the ways sunlight affects organ performance, we do know that being active and outside more during the day leads to better sleep, which leads to better immunity, decisions, and ultimate health the very next day.

So long as we stay in rhythm, our performance and enjoyment of life increases. Talk about free medicine!

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The Dash: Poem by Linda Ellis

I read of a man who stood to speak
At the funeral of a friend
He referred to the dates on the tombstone
From the beginning…to the end

He noted that first came the date of birth
And spoke the following date with tears,
But he said what mattered most of all
Was the dash between those years

For that dash represents all the time
That they spent alive on earth.
And now only those who loved them
Know what that little line is worth

For it matters not, how much we own, 
The cars…the house…the cash.
What matters is how we live and love
And how we spend our dash.

So, think about this long and hard.
Are there things you’d like to change?
For you never know how much time is left
That can still be rearranged.

If we could just slow down enough
To consider what’s true and real
And always try to understand
The way other people feel.

And be less quick to anger
And show appreciation more
And love the people in our lives
Like we’ve never loved before.

If we treat each other with respect
And more often wear a smile,
Remembering this special dash
Might only last a little while

So, when your eulogy is being read
With your life’s actions to rehash…
Would you be proud of the things they say
About how you spent YOUR dash?

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Published works: Hawaii—7 days, 4 islands, 1 cruise

My latest for Paste Magazine: “This year I’m pretty sure I discovered the most convenient, if not affordable, way to island hop Hawaii. It’s called “inter-island” cruising and Norwegian is the only liner exclusively doing it. While other cruises incorporate a couple Hawaiian islands on larger South Pacific itineraries, Norwegian’s 7-day Inter Island Cruise aboard the Pride of America sets sail every week of the year from its home port in Honolulu.

“After port-hopping with my wife for seven days to Hawaii’s four most famous islands—Oahu, Maui, Kauai, and “The Big Island”—I’d use one word to sum up the experience: exceptional. As the only cruise ship in the world to fly a U.S. flag from its stern, Pride of America is a special, award-winning, and exotic journey into the heart of the country’s most fabled vacation destination. It’s like one big “Best of Hawaii” tour where you only unpack once while visiting five different ports and spending the majority of your time on land (no sea days here).”

Continue reading…

How to be disarming (and avoid crooks)

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When someone is “disarming,” it literally means that their very nature, character, and personality make you drop your weapons. In modern vernacular, someone who is disarming is calming. They encourage you to let your guard down.

This is an excellent skill to possess, especially if you work with a lot of people in sometimes tense situations. While it’s healthy to be cautious and skeptical, sometimes each of us are also on high alert. Whether through previous baggage or PTSD, we are overly alarmed.

To counter this, a disarming person is vulnerable, unfiltered, honest, empathetic, and thoughtful. Some people might call this refreshingly real. That’s one way to be disarming.

Another way is to give another person a chance to process what you’re about to tell them. Prepare them for what you’d like to discuss. For instance, lead with “Can I ask you a difficult question?” if you need to talk about a touchy or sensitive subject, which should never be discussed cold. You could also try, “I have something sensitive to talk to you about. Is now a good time?”

As the discussion hopefully moves forward, don’t get emotional, which only arms someone further. Stay neutral and calm, even if things get tense. When you hear something that sounds harsh, try responding with: “What I heard you say was this: [What they said.] Is that right?”

If they rightfully call you out for doing something wrong or offensive, don’t forget to offer a heartfelt apology. “I’m sorry I did that. Will you forgive me?”

Now, a third way to be disarming is to be incredibly perceptive, hyper alert to body language, and charming. Often times to the point of being manipulative. You don’t want to be this kind of disarming unless you are a con man or crook.

Finally, what’s the best way to tell if you’ve been disarmed by a genuine person or a crook? The former will leave you feeling good about yourself. The later will make you feel good on the outside but uneasy on the inside. As if something was slightly off. Pay attention to those feelings.

Our gut instincts have helped us survive for thousands of years and they will help you to, but you have to listen to them. Good luck!

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3 hours too late: The price of slowly replying to email

I was recently invited on a once-in-a-lifetime trip to attend two icons of European sport in a single week: Wimbledon and Le Mans. It would have been an all-expense paid trip for my travel column.

Apparently some journalist couldn’t attend, so I was emailed a last minute invite in his place. First-class overseas airfare. Center court Wimbledon tickets. 5-star hotel. Several Michelin-rated restaurants. And test driving a fancy new sports car around Le Mans! I was giddy with the prospects of visiting and writing about the experience, but I knew not to count my chickens until they hatched.

Because I check email infrequently in an effort to stay sane and get more work done, I didn’t accept the invitation until nearly three hours later, after consulting with my wife. Several days passed, and I didn’t hear back. A few days later, I replied again and the publicist apologetically told me that “this invite filled up fast,” so I didn’t get the booking.

Maybe the person that did was a bigger deal than me. Maybe the good luck gods were conspiring against me. Or maybe had I checked my email more quickly I could have locked in the reservation.

Whatever the reason, I’ll never go back to constantly checking email like I did 13 years ago. If I actually did lose this gig because I was slow to respond, the last 13 years of better sanity and productivity were totally worth it. I’m certain the next 13 will be, too. But this one stings, even if it’s the epitome of all first-world problems.

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