I like Shirley Temples. A lot.

So imagine my frustration this weekend, when I was told by eight different grocers, including one floor manager, that they didn’t know what it was or if they even had it. “You might want to try a liquor store,” one lady incredulously advised me, as if I haven’t purchased at least two dozen bottles of the delicious red syrup at other grocers over the years.

Most upsetting, though, was not a single worker said, “I’m not sure if we sell that, but I will find out.” Not a single one.