This is Lucy. She was my family’s first real dog after Harley didn’t work out. She lived with us for 10 years and was an amazing pooch.

We put her down this spring after she bit and killed our neighbor’s cat, while walking with our son. Over the last year, Lucy became increasingly aggressive and loud as her hearing and eyesight worsened with age (a common trait among aging dogs and grandpas). Before that, she was remarkably chill and never bit or really barked at anything before.

It go so bad, however, that we recently had to limit her walks, and I stopped taking her on backpacking trips, since she became more of a nuisance on those trips compared to the fun she used to be for the first nine years of her life. This saddened me because I started to resent Lucy in her final year. I suspected we might have to put her down soon if her aggression and health worsened. But I never thought it would have ended like this.

It makes me sad just thinking about it. But here we are. Lucy’s gone. I miss her. And I regret not taking one final picture with her, walking with her in the mountains one last time, or giving her a big bowl of ice cream before euthanizing her.

I believe all dogs go to heaven, though. So if I get there too, I look forward to seeing Lucy’s docked, nubby tail wiggle with excitement again and doing all three of those things with her. Until then, here are some of my favorite captioned photos of this one-of-a-kind mutt (50% bulldog, 25% beagle, 25% labrador.)

So long Lucy. We love you.

This is the night we got Lucy on Thanksgiving weekend. She was a flopsy, lovable thing—the most chill pup of the litter. Here she is pictured with Sadie, our oldest child.

Here she is a few days later for her first real portrait in our home.

And here she is all sprawled out on my office rug, where she would quietly lay every weekday as I wrote from my desk. The great thing about Lucy is she could be as chill or as active as our lifestyle allowed. She never got stir crazy but could hike for 20 miles no problem.

All grown up and smiling in our gazebo.

Embracing our backyard lawn.

Here she is pictured with my five children for Christmas a couple of years ago.

Because our family travels a lot, our neighbor and friend Kathy (pictured) would usually board Lucy with her dog Hope while we were away. And when we were on vacation, Lucy was too! She would go on roadtrips in Kathy’s camper, get to sleep in beds and sofas, and eat soft serve ice cream.

Two years ago we welcomed our second dog into our home—a chihuahua named Roxy. Lucy let Roxy sleep on her day and night. That’s just the type of dog she was.

Here’s Roxy sleeping on her mattress Lucy on our backdoor mat.

And here they both are cooling off on our chilled kitchen tile in summer.

Lucy loved to go on hikes, backpacking trips, campouts, walks on the river trail. She was terrified of fireworks and vacuums and treated both as if they would kill her at any second. She never got over these fears, despite my repeated attempts of exposure therapy. Whenever we hiked together, Lucy would run well ahead of me to check out the trail, then back again to check on me. She did this the entire trail, no matter how long. Here she is pictured at the end of one of those trails—the summit of Mount Timpanogos near our home in Provo.

I love to swim. Lucy didn’t. But she was such a loyal dog and wanted to be near (if not protect) me in the wilderness, that she would always jump in after me. Here she is about to jump in and join me in Ryder Lake for a few seconds before quickly heading back to shore, which she always did.

This is one of my all-time favorite photos of Lucy and I in the Uintah Mountains, taken by my brother-in-law Clay. Whenever I caught a fish, she would lower her neck and curiously sniff it. “What is this delicious thing you fetched from the water?” she seemingly would ask.

And here’s another close-up captured by Clay from that same trip.

One of the hardest parts of losing a dog is realizing that they’re much more loyal to us than we are to them. That’s why we call them “Man’s Best Friend.”